Playing Poker Online

It was time for a fresh start. I went to another site dedicated to playing poker online at, ( Review) and sat through a patronising but ultimately helpful tutorial on the ins and outs of Texas Hold 'Em Poker.

Part 2 - Playing Poker Online For The First Time

Then I logged on to a practice game - play money only - in which BadChris was represented as a 3D character, a nerdy guy with glasses, seated among other 3D characters. Here were Johnnyboy60, T-Roy5, fresh daddy, McFly_81(Maria Stein) and the estimable Smoky20. I bought $1,000 worth of chips with my pretend money. After the first hand I was actually up by $2. Fifteen minutes later and I was up $136. I was feeling confident playing online poker.

Looking around the edges of the screen, I saw that there was a facility for me to chat with my opponents, although no one had availed themselves of it in the half hour I had been online. I decided to get the ball rolling.

BadChris: nice hollyday?

No one answered. I raised $10, two people folded. A pair of fives came up on the flop. No use to me. Then:

T-roy5: so is anyone else here from detroit?

I pocketed my winnings and headed for another table. After five minutes' play I cleared my virtual throat.

BadChris: you know what? I could sure go for a muffin right about now

Greathand77: did u mean muff

helensmum: im having a muffin right now

BadChris: what kind is it?

helensmum: blueberry

Greathand77: lmao

I was chatting and playing online poker at the same time. I was holding my own at Texas Hold 'Em, a game whose rules have always eluded me. I felt I was ready to play for real money again. I put another $50 dent in my credit card and found a table where the stakes were $2-4. This, as it turned out, was a little rich for my blood. Most of the players came to the table with three or four times the amount of money that I had brought and could force me out of a hand at will. I didn't fold when I should have, and when I did it was too late. There was no time to chat here; the robot moderator kept saying, "BadChris! It's your turn to act! Hurry up!". I hesitated, and I lost. The whole 50 went in three hands.

Very much chastened, I went back to William Hill Poker (William Hill Poker Review), ponied up another 50, and sat in on a game where the stakes were never higher than 50 cents and the pot averaged $16. I joined in, played eight cautious hands and lost half my money. I was ready to give up when I was dealt an ace and a two in the pocket; I hung around because of the ace, but another two came up on the flop, and then miraculously, another two on the turn. Meanwhile the player to my left had driven everyone else out with his high-handed betting. I looked at his pathetic username, andypoke, and decided he couldn't beat three twos on his momma's birthday. I raised him 50 cents. He called. I won. I logged off with $49.40 in chips, just 60 cents down on the day if you don't count the 100 bucks I lost earlier. And if you don't count the money I'm going to lose tonight playing online poker after my wife goes to bed.

Go back to page 1 of 2 of this article - Playing Poker Online: Online Poker Player

By The Guardian - Tim Dowling
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